Wildest Africa: Rules of Engagement

Over the weekend I hosted my American friend and he got to see the wild side of South Africa. In addition to driving on the left side of the road, he had a couple more things to learn on general safety rules and cultural guidelines applicable in Africa.

The pictures of the animals were taken at Jaci’s Lodge Madikwe and Lion Park.

Lesson 1: All crossing species have right of way

Unless of course you have a problem with that, then take it up with the rhinos.

black rhinos crossing the road
black rhinos crossing the road

Lesson 2: Get smash proof windows

Smash-and-grab windows are an Africa innovation to prevent you from being grabbed for dinner, not your purse.  Simply put; here you’re the prey and are somewhere close to the bottom of the food chain. I hope this puts things into perspective.

roll those windows up
roll those windows up

Lesson 3: No dog trap doors

Trust me, your dogs don’t like them too because they don’t feel safe.

domestic pets
domestic pets

Lesson 4: Drink bottled water

Public fountains will get you killed; literally! Learn from the naive impala.

a cautionary tale about public drinking
a cautionary tale about public drinking

Lesson 5: Leave your fancy designer stuff at home

Or do you think you can compete. They’re wearing the real stuff. 100% authentic and we can never be sure of that label on you claiming authenticity. Do you?

stripes by African Couture Spring 2013
stripes by African Couture Spring 2013

Lesson 6: Individualism is not advised

Don’t separate from your group. Don’t take stupid walks alone in the woods, this is not Narnia!

doesn't he just look like he'll never be found
last time seen

If you think I’m over reacting, see the African philosophy in action:

safety in number plus probability theory
safety in number, may the odds forever be in your favour

And most importantly, the cool kids are doing it. So don’t be a looser, be part of a crowd!

mobs rock
mobs rock!

Lesson 7: All rules have exceptions

We’re not as rigid as some folks so all rules have exceptions. I mean what will you tell this guy?

who's king?
who’s king?

So if somehow you still find yourself in a pickle: Keep calm. Then run!

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